07.13.02 � 10:33 pm

I spent all day working on my various English assignments and still am not totally finished. Before I knew it, the day was over and shit...where did the time go?

I haven't really had much to say diary-wise lately. I don't know what the reason is, it's like I sit down to spill my guts and there's nothing there. Have I gone mad? Do I have no thoughts?

I've been feeling somewhat down today. Maybe it's the monotony of doing schoolwork all day. Things with Todd are still good. I daresay he's the greatest thing that's happened to me in a long time. Those of you that know me well, know my inability to maintain a relationship. I know that's mostly because I choose to date completely shallow jackasses, but still...it's frustrating. I've been wondering why Todd was suddenly thrown into my life NOW. Perhaps it's because I'm finally at a place where I don't give a fuck about Chris and I'm losing some of my bitterness over him.

I DO worry that all of this smiley happy love-is-grand shit with Todd could come crashing down at any moment. What would I do? I honestly don't think my heart could take another break up.

But then maybe I'm crazy for worrying. Maybe I should wait until I have good REASON to worry. Maybe it's me subconsciously sabotaging something WONDERFUL?

Todd is sweet and funny and kind. He's affectionate and considerate. He's smart and educated. He's a great kisser. I absolutely adore spending time with him.

Did I tell you he wrote me a song? He said he spent all night trying to think of words that rhyme with "Kristina" and all he could come up with was "Hyaena". So, as we're laying there, he's singing me some nonsensical song with just those two words.

How did I get so lucky?

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