12.22.02 � 10:14 pm

pda....and no i don't mean "personal digital assistant"

To the people sitting in front of me in the theater tonite:

Do you really think that I paid $6 to watch your digustingly inappropriate displays of affection?? Your incessant slurping and otherwise repulsive mouth sucking noises made it impossible to ignore your foolish behavior. Grow the fuck up. Get a room. Making out like that in public is SO '81. Show some class.

Also, to the divine being who controls the details of my life:

Newsflash: I want my life to be a fairy tale. Really. I'm not kidding

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